I just can’t…

As a young angler I chose Blue Fox spinners because my brother used Mepps, and even today I have trouble putting a Mepps on my swivel. It makes no sense, but the deep-rooted idea spawned in sibling rivalry continues.
I thought about this last night as I was stock-piling caddis patterns for this weekend’s trip to the Upper Stanislaus, because I had to remove eight ant patterns to make room. I have never fished those ants, because I hate them. Not the patterns, but ants themselves. I have a deep-rooted, completely ridiculous hatred for ants. Mom tells me I was once playing on a hill in Nebraska when I was 5-ish and the red ants lashed out. So maybe it’s because of that, or when I came home from a summer in Alaska and saw an ant trail like a rope crossing my kitchen floor.
But wouldn’t using ant patterns to catch fish be kind of like feeding something I hate to something I love? Seems to make sense, but on the other shoulder is the hateful Jeff, saying that acknowledging any ant benevolence is turning my back on such a finely developed and nourished prejudice. Of course I did used to think that fly-fishing was stupid two decades ago, so maybe I should just get over it, drift an ant pattern, catch a fish and rid myself of limitation.
Or sell them to a couple friends since I am almost out of elk hair…and Raid for that matter.

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